Winning and Losing

Friday, May 11, 2018

A few years ago, my Panget bought board games for us to play with the kids.  Kailee and Connor were so excited even if they didn't know how to play these games.  My Panget got Chutes and Ladders (kids version of snakes and ladders), Monopoly, Jenga, Connect and Trouble.

We started with the simplest one, Chutes and Ladders.  We of course, explain to them the rules on how to go forward in the game and how it is also possible to go back a few or multiple steps back when a corresponding piece lands on a chute.  It was quite easy, right?  So we played.  The kids were really excited.  They went back and forth on the board and when finally, Kailee won - she screamed so excitedly of joy and happiness.  Meanwhile, Connor was screaming a very loud *NOooooooo!* and cried, as in seriously crying.  We all stopped and wondered why he was crying.  When had calmed a bit, we asked him why he cried and screamed - apparently, it was because he lost.  We had to explain to him that in games, there are winners and losers, that not all games can be won by everyone.  But he vowed never to play Chutes and Ladders *ever* again because he lost.

Next up was Jenga.  Well, as you might guess - Connor lost again because the pieces fell as he was trying to ease one out.  It came as a shock to him that the pieces fell and so he cried again.  I think he was getting disheartened with the board games because he wasn't winning.  That night, he declared that he doesn't want to play board gaim *ever* again because he always loses.

Now - how do you properly teach your kids the notion of winning and losing.  I know we all want to win, but games are a game of chance (and skill) and skills develop as you grow and learn.  I honestly have no idea on how to teach him that losing is sometimes okay.  Kailee has been a very good sport, is it because she's a girl and is not as competitive as her brother?  I am not sure really, but she took losing the game really well.  She just told me that it's okay for her to lose.

We have been explaining to Connor the concept of winning and losing in games - but I think, maybe he's too young?  I am not sure - or maybe he's not really wanting to understand the situation.

Help??

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