#OTWOLDiaries: Heartbroken, 2+ years after... + my thoughts

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

May I ask you to load and play this Video as you read this post:

2 years - that's a LOOOONG time. That is if you count the number of days.  But is it enough time to get over a heartbreak?  As they say - time heals all wounds.  It does - time makes you forgive, but not forget what happened.  It becomes a memory from the past - feelings get a bit toned down, but the feeling might still be there - hidden somewhere until a trigger brings it out again.

Apologies for this long post.  I will cut it short so you can just click if you want to go ahead and read the rest or just ignore the link if you've had enough of my #OnTheWingsOfLove posts..

If you ask me, I don't think Leah and Clark have moved on.  Career wise - they have, but personally, they're still stuck in a time loop of memories (happy and painful ones).  Leah has been writing to Clark - that's a sign of nor being able to move on.  To be honest, the idea at first was quite nice BUT then when I've had time to think about it - it will be of little help in moving on because you're still writing to your old flame!

But then, I realized - people cope and move on differently.  Different strokes for different folks.  There may be guidelines, proven methods - but only YOU will be able to determine what you'll do.  There is no one clear cut way to make moving on easy.  It really depends on the person.  For Leah she wrote letters, a diary for Clark.  For Clark, he immersed himself in a certain piece and his furniture business.


I remember distinctly when I was younger, it was discussed with friends that closure was very important to be able to move on.  Now that I'm older older - I learned that not everything in life has closure.  I've learned to let go of some issue and just take them as it is.  I used to question and wanted to find the answers, but then - after a while, you tire when you look for answers.

I believe with Leah and Clark - time was their *Pause Button* in their relationship.  I feel that they never really parted per-se, but instead it was only shelved or put on hold.  It was also a plus that they were never in contact, they never got the chance to speak to one another - there was the distance.

But when they met again - BOOM.  Memories came rushing back in.  What once was forgotten, now is being recalled - reminisced.  They're concentration - SHATTERED!  To us viewers, it's a delight to see them in that state - because WE KNOW that they still have feeling for one another.  But for them - well, I'm sure they're all going bonkers inside.  One saying that I distinctly remember and can perfectly describe them is *Nananahimik na ako, tapos ngayon kagulo nanaman*  Yes, that's what love does.  It makes you go cray cray!  Hahaha...


I'm sure it's Simon who is boiling mad.  Well, I'm boiling mad at him!!  I really got irritated when he asked Clark *Are you looking for work?*  WTH?  Where did that come from?  Did he really think that less of Clark?  It angered me, really.  But it was nice of Clark to answer the way he did - that there's an exposition for his furnitures.  Good one Clarky boy!!  Way to go!!

Leah's career is doing good.  But you know what, I really wish she just told the truth to Clark that the reason why she wanted to take the job in Dubai was to further her career.  In the past episodes, she was always saying that it was her family - that was the reason she told Clark and us viewers.  Last week's episode we learned that she also wanted that for herself.  HONESTY.  Had she told Clark of her plans, I'm sure they could have worked something out.  She left out the part where she ambitioned to become something great.  I'm not saying she shouldn't have - I'm all for it.  What I'm saying is FULL DISCLOSURE of what her plans are and what she wanted.  I guess in the midst of her problems, she was also confused.  She didn't know what she wanted.

Being away from her family, friends and loved ones taught her one thing - to be STRONG.  I guess being away gave her CLARITY, to see what she really wanted.  She became stronger - emotionally.  And she was too strong at that!  During last week's confrontation scene with Clark.  I became afraid of Leah - I even told friends that she's become too matapang.  What has gotten into her?  Clarity.  That's what distance does to you, it gives you CLARITY, it makes you stronger emotion wise.  You'll get to realize what really is important to you.  And I think Leah did not appreciate that Clark made her choose.  I have to say that she was also surprised with her answer - she has kept those emotions inside for a long time and finally, she was able to let it out.

As for Clark - he made her choose because that's the only way for him to confirm Leah's decision.  And it was at the heat of the moment - both were angry and hurt and stressed. He knew it all along, but it was never verbalized.  He was surprised but not so much.  You know what I mean!  Hahaha..  Waiting for the one you love is NEVER easy.  Many will say that if you love a person you will be willing to wait for them even it if means eternity.  Unfortunately, I am not one of those.  I will tell you to wait BUT give yourself a time frame because YOLO, you deserve to be happy.  I've always believed that the first thing you need to do is MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY because that is where your contagious happiness will stem from.  And with Clark, he's always made everyone except for him - happy.  He's put forth everyone else' concern over of his.  His family was his priority too.  When he met Leah, it was a huge change for him because he finally felt happy.  Remember Cullen saying that he hasn't seen Clark smile?  That's what happiness & love does to a person.  Clark needed time off the relationship if you ask me.  I wish it were on a different circumstance, but I think what happened will make way for a very good ending.

Tita Jack was right - Clark and Leah started the relationship broken.  There's truth to that, but you know what - you don't need to be in a perfect state to start a relationship.  They were forced into a situation but they knew first hand why they needed to go into that relationship.  It was supposed to be a professional relationship.  But being together, spending time together made them fall in love with unexpectedly.  They kept their feelings to themselves - because they knew the relationship should be strictly *professional*.  But it happened.  Once Leah knew she was in love with Clark - she ran away.  Mostly because she thought her mother had left them for another family.  She became more broken and confused.  She vowed that she will NEVER ruin a family relationship (Cousins Clark & Jiggs) so she went home.  Clark on the otherhand, for the first time in his life wanted to fight for their love even if it means hurting his cousin and Tita Jack (who he was very honest with - I admire that he had the balls to admit that he was in love with Leah)

Clark pursued and pursued Leah.  We all saw that.  We were all witness to the gimmiks that Clark had to make in order for Leah to believe that love is worth fighting for.

We also were witness to how Leah tried her hardest not to fall for Clark.  She did so many things that were simply wrong in our eyes because we were all so in love with Clark.  When finally, Clark grew tired - she eventually realized what we all know - that Clark Medina was worth it.

But Clark was severely hurt.  We all saw it.  We all felt it.  We all felt sorry for Clark.  We all wanted to shake Leah into her senses.  We all wanted to make Leah see what we have seen and known all along - that Clark Medina is WORTH IT.

We're all still grieving.  I am still hurting too.  My heart is aching whenever Leah insinuates that Angela is his girlfriend.  Leah - YOU WERE NOT LISTENING, Angela is Jiggs' LALABS!  Clark has mentioned it before and you were too busy to hear it!  My head is shouting YOU WERE NOT LISTENING!!  Hahaha...

In the episodes this week.  I've come to question how Leah as risen the ranks when her ideas towards her *love* live and husband are always so mediocre.  The ideas she has in her head with matter of the heart - I mean, where did they come from?  She was the one who initiated the breaking up, and now the divorce!  What the hell, Leah Olivar??!!  WTF?  Ganyan ka ba talaga?  Hahaha!! :)

So #OTWOLMeetTheClient was an episode that hastens the conflict.  We saw that Leah is still affected by the idea, the sight and the sound of Clark Medina.  We saw too how much of an asshole Simon is - when he assumed Clark was a nobody.  We saw Clark trying to be strong and holding a brave front so as not to give Leah the satisfaction that he is still not over her.


Yes, that is what rules this episode.

Pride that Clark didn't want to run after Leah anymore because he's done everything possible but it still ended up with Leah breaking up with him.

Pride that Leah feels that she's made the right decision.  Well, she has to stand by her decision.  She's just justifying it by assuming that Angela is with Clark.

Pride that Simon feels he's made a concrete effort of keeping Leah and Clark apart for the longest time.

I have always believed that if it's meant to be - IT IS MEANT TO BE.  No ifs or buts.  Just that things will fall into place at the right time and at the right moment.

Simon thought time has healed Leah.  He has been patient enough with her.  He has given her a LOT of time to move on, heal, grow up and see his efforts.  He feels that he's accomplished his goal - to make Leah choose him when the time comes.  His dreams are instantly shattered when by stroke of destiny, Clark and Leah bump into one another.  At that moment - it was GAME OVER SIMON.  But he refused to acknowledge that - he knew Leah was still hurting because she felt that Clark let go of her.  And Simon is banking on that *hurt* too to win Leah.

I totally understand Clark - how he's scared to go after Leah because of what happened.  It's truly a risk.  And of course, he knew based on experience that Leah might not choose him.  Well, she never chose him anyway.  To lessen the hurt and feeling of loss - Clark was just accepting of the situation.  He was wrong to assume Simon and Leah are together.  I mean, look at all the signs - if they were an item - why weren't they HOLDING HANDS at the very least?  Everything was *professional*.  Simon even said *business partner*.

As for Leah, well - she needed to stand by her decision.  I'm sure she has questions and regrets.  But of course what should prevail is her professionalism.  She needed to do this to prove to herself and to justify her decision.  Look at the effort to push the idea Angel and Clark are together in her mind.  Grabe lang ha, I mean she couldn't get over it.  But I guess she needed that to justify that Clark has moved on.

Parehas lang LUTANG si Clarka and Leah.  ASSUMING silang dalawa.  Ang sarap nilang pukpukin sa head, my golly!  If I can only scream at the TV screen and they can hear me.  But that would kill the story honestly.

I'm sure the ending will be predictable, but I'm sure we'd all enjoy the cheesy-ness and the predictability.

I'm so very sure we will all be treated to a great ending.

Please, for the life of me - DON'T RUIN THE FINALE!!!

Please lang...

P.S.  My apologies if my post is confusing.  I have a lot of ideas in my head and I just typed it as I went along.  Bear with me please.  Thank you!!

Yun lang, so what do you think?  Leave a comment!  PLEASE.  Ler me know your thoughts.

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